Sitting At the Edge of Fatalism [The Love Trilogy I]

I will cloak nothing in words

This time around

For this is about how I have come

and to be

and to believe

You notice much of my work

Mentions death

But honestly, my work ends in death, because it begins a life

Proceeds a journey

And that journey ends in death

It is not a hope or a wish

It is not a goal I strive to attain

Eventhough

I see death as a jumping off point, to the next adventure

But that adventure is UNLike those of the LIVING

And if you cut THIS life short

You will realize what a mistake you made, when you begin your next

These are my only feelings on the matter

It is not a question of Heaven or Hell, Pain or Punishment

We make mistakes

Some grave

And we pay for them

And we learn from them

And we are made an instrument through them

For a mistake may send us to hell

But then you were needed in hell, for maybe one needed a rescue

and having been to hell, you now can advise, with surety, those who would attempt a visit

To avoid it at all costs

But you also know, that you cannot change a person’s destiny

For they may be scheduled for such a trip, as were you.

But Hell teaches you to Love everyone

How?

Because after the experience, in your heart, You would not desire such an experience

upon even your worst enemy.

So even if, I know, you must go, I must try to change your mind

But I will not stop you.

And you cannot forbid me to cry for you

for again, I love you

Misunderstand me not

For this hell is just a euphemism or me.  But I am like everyone

What I fear most of death is the method.

Will it be filled with pain?

Will it be tortuous?

Will I be terrified?

Or will it be quiet and painless?

I should have died in an electrical accident

As I lay dying, I though of nothing but saving myself

But looking back I think:

There I was, going through it.  It wasn’t a bad death.  It wasn’t painful and I had no control

That would have been an easy death

And I missed out

Now I’ll have to die all over again

And maybe it won’t be so easy next time

but I think, you know

Exactly what I mean

So I suppose, now, I’m very comfortable with the subject, though it puts many off.

But that is because we are all superstitious and to talk of death

one fears

is to invite him to dinner.  But if Death comes to your table, you should treat him as an honored guest

For he is hard working and he does not necessarily come for you when he appears.

Our lives will proceed as they should

If you are clever, you can sidestep that which can be avoided

But to cut time off of your journey HERE

Will only lengthen it THERE

For our train will arrive on schedule, come what may

So think not ill of me

For I am not morbid.  I cannot remember my beginnings

I can only look to my next beginning

And that can only come after death, which is no more or less important than birth

But I understand

For like all great journey’s

We hate to see them come to an end.

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